I know I stated in my last blog that I would not be blogging on my journey through cancer again, however, people have asked me to continue my blog and to share the 'What comes next?' taking them on the continuing journey with me. So here I am.
As you will all be aware, my treatment ended last July with chemotherapy finishing in June and radiotherapy in the first couple of days in July. I have gone through nine and a half months of very tough chemotherapy, I have had a bilateral mastectomy and I went through twenty five sessions of radiotherapy. It has been a rollercoaster of highs and lows. The highs being the times that I felt well, the unrelenting support from my entire family especially from my Sons Joe and Jim who basically ran our household while both Gerry and I were ill, the support from friends, neighbours and co-workers, the development of my love for arts and crafts, sunny days that have created feelings of happiness, the development of an appreciation of being alive, able to feel that sun, see the flowers, hear the birds and living. The lows being the numerous admissions into hospital, the too close encounters to 'Knocking on Heaven's Door', not being able to attend the funerals of both my dear and loved Uncle Ted and my Mother-in-Law, not being able to attend my brother's 40th birthday, the after effects of having gone through all this, the tiredness, the fatigue, the very low feelings of saddness and fear that continue plague me on a very regular basis and, sadly, the loss of friendships that this journey has brought with it.
I am sure that you will recall, from previous blogs, that one of my neighbours, who at the time, I only knew to nod and wave to, very kindly brought over 2 family sized meals for the boys to put into the oven for us. This is my neighbour Sarah. Prior to this Sarah and I did not know each other. I had called around to Sarah to take her some flowers by way of a thank you for a meal she had prepared for us the night before. I was invited in and we sat and chatted for some time. We talked about how society has changed over the years and how neighbourly gestures, such as the making of the meal and helping each other seems to have died with people becoming very 'insular'. We both talked about how nice it would be for some of the older attributes of being a 'neighbour' to be revived. A few weeks later, Sarah called over and asked me what I would be doing on Saturday the 30th July. I told her that I had nothing planned. "Well you do now!" said Sarah. Sarah had approached all the neighbours in our cul-de-sac and between them all they planned an 'end of treatment' street party. How fantastic! As it happened the sun shone brightly that day. Sarah and her sons decorated the cul-de-sac with bunting and balloons, Shay (another neighbour) and Sarah set out tables and a huge bouncy castle for the children (and adults) was erected at the end of the road. All the neighbours attended, there was not one absentee. All the neighbours provided food and drink and the bonding and building up of a friendly neighbourhood began. The day was amazing, and went on well into the night. I had to be poured into my bed by 11:00 pm but it was well worth it. It was so good in fact that we are hoping to hold another street party before Christmas. Halloween perhaps? Even the teens enjoyed themselves with us partying 'Oldies'.
Thank you to all my neighbours for the wonderful day, I believe I gave, or attempted to give a speech, something I can't actually remember doing (Thanks to Paul Earls who brought out the Wild Turkey), I just hope that I didn't make your ears bleed.... ;)
The following day the cleanup took place with Joe and Jim collecting any rubbish left out. Sarah had taken in all crockey, tupperware and glassware and washed the whole lot. Tables were returned and the bunting and the balloons taken down. Life in our col-de-sac was returning to normal. I think we held a heck of a party that will be talked about for some time. Roll on the planning of the second one.
ALTON TOWERS
Two weeks after our street party, we took the boys away for a couple of weeks. Again, as you will all be aware from previous blogs, Joe and Jim took turns to stay with me at the lodge during my third week there. Whilst Joe was staying with me, we discussed places that he would like to see. London was one of the top places on his 'to do' list along with Alton Towers, New York, Paris etc. So whilst he slept that night, I went online and booked a break to for us all to Alton Towers for a couple of nights, followed by three nights in London, then a week in Wales before returning home. This break away also took in Joe's 18th birthday. We headed over to Wales where we were staying at my family home for one night before setting of to Staffordshire and a two night stay in the Enchanted Village at Alton Towers. It was lovely. The 'Hobbit Hole' as we called it was like a family hotel room in a little 'shed'. It was quite the experience. I actually went on some wild rides, the Nemesis, Galactica (twice), Rita Queen of Speed - this nearly induced a heart attack, Blade and Duel. Gerry, Amy and the boys risked all on Oblivion and Amy, Joe and Jim on The Smiler... Now that was without doubt a 'No Go' for me. My nerves were on edge knowing my children were on that ride. We had a great time laughing and relaxing, taking in all the sights. On the first night I booked us into the steak house restaurant situated in the Alton Towers Hotel. The following day (Tuesday 16th Aug) was Joe's 18th Birthday. I had booked us a table with the Party Package in the Secret Garden Restaurant also situated within the Hotel. Our table was easy to spot, with helium filled balloons decorating it. We ordered our Meals and The waitress brought over a champagne bucked filled with ice and bottles of budweiser for us all. After our main course. The waitress brought over a big birthday cake, hushed the entire restaurant, announced Joe's birthday and had all the customers singing along to 'Happy Birthday'. At this point, I think Joe wanted to kill me... lol.... However, I know he secretly enjoyed himself. We returned to our 'Hobbit Hole' with a stop at the pub in the Enchanted Village. It was a lovely end to a lovely day. Wednesday morning we were up and packing before heading off to breakfast. After that we packed the car, set the route on google maps and headed off to London.
Here are a number of photographs from our visit to Alton Towers. The ones of my terrified face on Rita, Queen of Speed has been omitted for fear of it inducing nightmares in my readers. I didn't bother getting the one from Nemesis, When I looked at it, I actually looked as though I was dead on the ride... Aaarrrrgghhhhh!!!!! I hope the clip of Oblivion works, now that would induce nightmares going on that!
LONDON HERE WE COME!!!!!!
We set off after breakfast and decided to avoid the main motorways down to London as the traffic congestion on them was awful. Naturally we had to do some motorway driving but not all motorway. We stopped at the services for a break after an hour a couple of hours. In fact we were only half an hour away but my eyes were closing. Gerry, Amy and Jim went for a stroll around the serices and Joe and I had a half an hour nap. This did the trick and once again we hit the road heading for Camden Town. 
We arrived in Camden Town thanks to Google Maps. I found a parking place on the mains road and also a friendly traffic warden who allowed me to park there until I found the office from which I was to pick up the apartment keys. Mission accomplished and Gerry and I returned to the car and set off to find the apartment. Amy, Joe and Jim were in the back of the car waiting patiently for us. We were all quite tired after the journey and the excitement of the previous two days. I put the address into google maps and we headed off. Gerry was holding the paperwork on his knee, and after I had passed a turning three times and gone around the same block three times he pointed out and shouted... Yay, look there it is... It was a one way road with yellow lines down both sides so not parking was to be had there. Never the less, I pulled up to off load Gerry, Amy and the boys along with all the luggage. Once dropped off I watched them head for the apartment. I was about to pull away from the curb, when I noticed the crew heading back to the car with the luggage. With tiredness setting in and patience levels running low, tempers were starting to get short and snappiness started to set in.
"What is wrong?" I asked four very frustrated looking people.
"The bloody key doesn't fit the door" Snapped Gerry
"Yes, and he started giving out to us!" Exclaimed Amy
"No I didn't I was just saying...!" Gerry started.
"Yes you did, you started shouting at me...!" Amy cut in.
"Right, all of you stop or I will just drive off and leave you all the feck here!" I sharply retorted.
I took out the paper work that Gerry had been holding and looked for the number for the rental agency, I found the number and started to key it into my phone, when I saw the second page giving the property details.
"Gerry what number was that apartment that you were trying to get into?" I asked
Still annoyed Gerry snapped "118, just like it states on that sheet!"
"Well it is a bloody good job nobody was in, and reported you for attempted breaking and entering, Our apartment in 188!"
Gerry took the sheet read it and he, Amy and the boys re-packed the car and climbed in. Gerry now cross with himself more than anything else.
A short way down the road, under a railway bridge, then on the left we found the apartment. I groaned, from the outside it looked more like a derelict shop front than an apartment. But I kept quiet, in fact everyone kept quiet. I pulled over, once again on double yellow lines and everyone quickly unloaded the car. Whilst they all let themselves into the apartment, I drove a short distance down the road and parked up in a side road. I climbed out ready to do battle with the agency. I opened the door and to my amazement there I stood inside one of the most beautiful and trendy apartments that I could ever have wished for. Talk about looks being deceiving. Apologies swapped and moods forgotten everyone chose their rooms and we unpacked our bags, all the while looking forward to exploring London. 
The following three days were spent filled with laughter and fun. Trips up and down Camden Town, exploring the shops and Markets, On the underground to Buckingham Palace for the changing of the guards, a meal in the Hard Rock Cafe, A trip on the London Eye, visits to the London Dungeons, the War Museum, Hyde Park, Piccadilly Circus, Oxford Street and much, much more. On Saturday morning we took our time as we had a long journey back to Colwyn Bay in North Wales. It was to be quite a long drive, six and a half hours in all, with us experiencing a lot of wet and windy weather along the way. We left London at 11:00 a.m. We took our time and stopped for breakfast. Then back on the road and later that afternoon stopped for a late lunch. I even got to nap again in the car before continuing on once again. We finally arrived at my family home in Colwyn Bay just after 5:30p.m. Yes it had been a very long drive, however it seemed to go by quite quickly - if that makes any sense. That evening was to be an early night for all of us as we were quite tired by time we got home. Sunday was going to be a very busy day as the family had organised a BBQ for Joe's 18th Birthday Aunts, Uncles, Cousins and Second Cousins were all popping down for the day, so an early night was a must.
A few photographs of our London adventure:
Joe's 18th BBQ
On the Sunday, we all awoke to the excitement of preparations being underway to prepare for the BBQ that was taking place that day. Roy came down and put up his gazebo, Dad had the BBQ prepared, Mum had spent her whole weekend preparing a variety of salads, tomato and onion gravy, coleslaw, pizza, and so much more. Diane had made here quiches and there were lots of goodies for afterwards. The family all arrived and the wine flowed. In fact, it flowed too well indeed. We ate, we laughed, we had fun and we had some wonderfully cooked food. A cake was brought out and Happy Birthday sung to Joe. My around 10:00 that evening, my Sister and Gerry, helped me up the stairs and I was poured into my bed. It was a great day, but wine (a lot of it), worry and tiredness got the better of me and I was soon out for the count.Gerry returned home to Ireland while the boys and I spent the rest of the week in Wales with my family. It was a very relaxed week, just what was needed after our very busy and hectic week taking in Alton Towers and London. Sunday arrived all to quickly and very soon it was time to head back over the Irish Sea to our Home here in Arklow. We returned to Ireland on the Sunday and the boys returned to School for the new academic year on the Monday. However this was not the end of the excitement.
Monday arrived and the boys headed back to school for the start of the new term. This was to be a short week as Fridays this year are work experience days. However Joe and Jim were also having a very long weekend as they were not going to be in school the following Monday and Tuesday.
Pride of Ireland
I generally do not allow the boys to take days off as a rule, but this was different. My two boys had won the prestigeous award of Pride of Ireland Carers of the Year. On Thursday afternoon, I was invited into the school as a guest of the class and the teachers, where my sons fellow class mates were honouring the boys to demonstrate how proud they were of their winning the Pride of Ireland Carers Award. Tea and coffee along with cakes were served and a lovely speech from their teacher was made. There were very few dry eyes in the room.
Joe and Jim were to be presented with the award the following Monday evening at the Double Tree by Hilton in Dublin. We were being put up in the Gibson Hotel and being transported to the Double Tree by coach later on in the afternoon. They boys were suitably 'Suited and Booted' for the occasion, and looked so utterly handsome. Gerry and I could not have been prouder of them. It was an award so well deserved.
We arrived at the Gibson at 2:30pm. Our room was not quite ready, so we headed to the bar where I had a lovely pint of guinness and also got to meet Alan Hughes from Ireland AM, who was having a peaceful afternoon tea, until we disturbed him to ask if I could have my photograph taken with him. I have to say, he is every bit as pleasant in person as he is on TV and I was as happy as the proverbial "Pig in Shite" when he agreed to 'smile for the camera' with me ;) - No, those are not the clothes I wore to the award ceremony, I still had to change at this point.
Pint quaffed, it was time to head to our room to get ready for the ceremony, we were all so excited, however the boys were also a tad nervous too.We walked into our room and our jaws dropped, Joe and Jim had their own room and we had ours. They were beautiful with beds the size of wrestling rings. The shower was massive, in fact, if you were that way inclined it could have held about six people - room for me so :) The bed was unbelievably comfortable for a hotel bed, as you can see, I put it through it's paces!
We all got showered and dressed and were down stairs for the half past four deadline. Onto the coach and off to the Double Tree. There was a brief run through as to how the evening would unfold and where each person was to stand etc. We then went out to the champagne reception. Here we met Mrs. Cluskey, Joe and Jim's teacher who would be coming to the event with us. We headed through to the bar and had some champagne. I was doubly blessed, because who was standing right next to me and gave me a lovely smile? None other than my hero, Chris de Burgh. I was as excited as a kid in a sweet shop. It was all I could do to stop myself from carrying out my renditions of Spanish Train and Patricia the Stripper!!!!!
Gerry was delighted to meet and shake hands with Shay Given. I was amazed at just how pleasant all the celebrities there were. They were all quite happy to stand for photographs, stop and chat and really did not act as though their celebrity status made them any better than anyone else. This was lovely to see and be part of. Thank you to everyone who gave their time to be there with all our Pride of Ireland Heroes. 
A bell was rung and we all headed through to the tables for the three course meal and free wine that was on tap. We had a melon and pineapple started, steak dinner and a chocolate desert. Along with one or two glasses of wine just to be sociable. Once the meal was finished it was time for the award ceremony. It was brilliant, there were so many deserved awards handed out. Joe and Jim were the 6th award that was presented that night. To the delight of us all, the boys had their awards presented to them by Hozier. He is such a delightful young man. He chatted to Joe and Jim, stood for photos and was so utterly pleasant. If he ever does get to read this blog, Thank you Hozier from us all :)
Click on the link to see a clip of the night. https://youtu.be/cp1tZhb7imY
Joe, Jim and myself were called up and a few questions asked. The boys answered their questions beautifully, spoke clearly in front of over three hundred people. Once again they made me so very proud. The boys were awarded this for taking care of both Gerry and I. Gerry, as you will know from earlier blogs, was diagnosed with crohns disease and had to have surgery at the time that I was going though chemo. The boys ran the household, carrying out all the chores necessary, cooked and basically ran the home and sorted our meds. They were in fact, quite amazing. After the awards, we had an after party and left at about one in the morning. We headed back to our hotel and then had a drink together as a family before heading to our rooms. It was all in all a fantastic night.
The following day we headed into Dublin and had a stroll around before heading home. Coming down off our high having been mingling with the stars the night before.
Back to reality
Since then life has now started getting back to normal. I have had my review with the oncologist, although I have not been given the absolute clear, my tumour markers are back up to 35 (hopefully they will plateau out there), I have to have an RNI (bone scan) and a CT scan on all my organs. Hopefully they will be clear. If that is the case, then I do not need to be seen by the oncologist agian until March. Yes six months. That fills me with hope as previously they wanted me to attend the clinic every three months. I am very happy with this decision, although it really does take some getting your head around the fact that you don't have to attend the hospital for a long time if ever again, it takes a strong will and is a mentally fatiguing challenge to stop thinking that every twitch and twinge is the cancer returning. It is a constant battle, first accepting the diagnosis of cancer, learning to live with it, accepting you have it and putting on the gloves to fight back. Once you have fought all you can, and succeeded, as far as you are aware, it is a case of having to learn all over again how to manage without cancer and the 'medical crutch' of having hospital support on speed dial, it is almost a feeling of having been abandoned. Your mind runs riot with the 'what ifs' but you just have to be strong otherwise depression and fear could wear you down.
It has taken cancer and a very scary year to make me realise that I am to 'work to live' and not 'live to work'. With this in mind, I have started now as I mean to go on. I will be 50 in a couple of weeks. I want to enjoy life, and on occasions some of the finer things in life. I began taking those steps today, and treated myself to an early 50th birthday present.
It is 'new to me'. It is something I would not have dreamed of purchasing in the past. My aging 4x4 was practical and a work horse. Now though after the dreadful year, a little style, comfort and self indulgence won't do any harm ;) I intend to be around for a very long time to drive this beauty. Fantastic so it is.
I have also been out and had an addition to my tattoo collection. A dreamcatcher that catches all my nightmares and gets rid of my fears. In my tattoo you will notice that the feathers on the dreamcatcher fold together to resemble the breast cancer ribbon.
On Friday 14th October, I am hosting a coffee morning and cake sale in order to raise funds for cancer research. I will be splitting all money raised into two groups. One will be going to St. Vincent's Breast Cancer Clinic and the other will be going to St. Luke's a hospital dedicated to caring for those with cancer. Both hospitals have taken great care of me and many others that I know. If you are about, please support this event.
I the meantime, appreciate being well, alive and make sure you are all happy in what you do. If not, sit back, take stock and see what you have to do to make your life a happy one.
